How to keep relationships at a distance no matter what
We think that among our readers there are a lot of people who are open to communication, who travel a lot, which means there are those who once had a love of their whole life, which was only clouded by a single problem - thousands of kilometres separated you with your loved one. Sometimes it seems that such relationships are doomed to failure, but we think differently and have found a selection of tips on how to maintain and develop harmonious relationships from a distance.
Of course, a variety of instant messengers is much more convenient than Skype - you can be in touch all day. But still, try to talk with each other more often - and preferably in Skype, rather than write messages. In correspondence, it is impossible to accurately convey intonation, even if you have known each other for a long time together and perfectly. In a telephone conversation, you do not see each other's facial expressions - and you also lose a lot.
Talk about the little things
If it seems to you that you have absolutely nothing to talk about every day, stop making up talking points. This is what keeps you in touch - trying to come up with a topic for conversation. People who nearby do not need it and your task are to create the illusion that you are so close to each other. Therefore, talk about the little things about which the couple would speak, living together. It will bring you closer together than talking about shared dreams and plans for the future.
If you tell each other about different little things (as you probably would have done it while sitting in the same kitchen), both of you will feel more emotional intimacy. Our whole life consists of a series of events, so it is not necessary to hide them from a partner.
Do not touch the topic of distance
If your darling went to another country, you, of course, will be very interested in finding out how life is arranged there. But the less you ask about it - the better (if, of course, you are not going to move in with him). Because the feeling of a completely alien world will sooner or later begin to be associated with a loved one. And he will also become a stranger.
Meet in neutral territory
If you have to be on a distance for a long time, select a point on the map, to which both of you will be convenient to reach, and meet there. Do not let the situation in which you are sitting and waiting, when he will visit you.
How to keep relationships at a distance? It is annoying to write cute all the time; the video call also does not bring unusual tenderness. But it is essential to understand that you need it. The lovers express most of their feelings non-verbally: holding hands, hugging and kissing. While you are deprived of this opportunity, you will have to fill the tenderness with words.
Meet more often
It is clear that the frequency of your meetings depends on many factors: on distance, schedule of studies or work, on finances. But you must establish a program of sessions on the principle of "no less than ...". Will it be possible to meet only in half a year? You should know for sure that this meeting will take place. Agree on this in advance - this is essential advice for relationships at a distance.
Do something together
Fortunately, modern communications allow you to select products for dinner in real time: for example, turn on Skype and go to the store. It incredibly brings you together, because, firstly, it creates the illusion of presence, and secondly, it removes the problem “we have nothing to talk about”.
Do not lie
Lying in a relationship at a distance is unusually convenient because the partner will never know that he has been deceived. The problem is that you get used to lying. When you find yourself close again, it will be difficult to unlearn the habit of lying and keeping back, hiding some uncomfortable moments. Of course, you can’t check if your darling is lying to you. But at least do not lie. This will help your future relationship.
Do not be jealous
Is love possible at a distance without jealousy? With jealousy, in general, it is difficult to fight, and in a relationship at a range - almost impossible. Therefore, it is not necessary to start. All you can do is trust your partner, and there are no other options. If you are not ready - it is better to leave. If he is not prepared - it’s just necessary to break up: it will still happen a little later, but before that, he will have time to thoroughly ruin your life, forcing you to make excuses constantly
Do not suffer
Another essential tip about distance relationships. Do not turn your life into a waiting room. It is necessary to understand that there are only two options: either you live life to the fullest - yes, as long as each has his own, but only so far - or you break up. People are poorly adapted to suffering; our psyche seeks to reject everything that is associated with negative feelings. Thus, the more you worry about the fact that the beloved is far away from you, the sooner you will understand that this stranger, in essence, is a person who annoys you wildly. And, perhaps, you will cease to answer his calls. If this outcome does not suit you, try to worry as little as possible about the fact that your darling is not close. It is temporary, and it is not forever.
As in the usual novel, in a relationship at a distance should be a place of feelings. Freely talk about how much you miss him, how you would like to see him nearby. If the situation does not change, but you both want to be together, it is essential to use modern means of communication to the fullest.